View from my place...

Did I just give away where I live???? No stalking, please...

"Who are you? I am who I choose to be" - Sidney Poitier

"I am who I choose to be" - really? (haha)

Of course, I am who I choose to be. Life is a journey full of choices. Even as a newborn, if I was fed something to my dislike, it was my choice to spit or swallow (haha - I know - distasteful choice of phrasing). At every moment, we make a choice towards one particular action over another. Choices form who we become and who we will be. This is not to disregard the arguments of fate and/or events that are beyond our control. However, presented with any situation, it is our choice to decide how to deal with the situation. Some choices we make without too much thoughts but some choices we lament over for too long. After a course of action has been chosen, there is no going back - but, going forward, there are choices that can be taken to change the course of action. Choices, choices, choices - small or big - they mold us to who we are at the moment.

If I get to choose who I become, shouldn't I feel as if I have more control of my path in life?

Special bond

Whenever I feel as if the whole world has ganged up against me, I would read the following posting that my dear sweet cousin M wrote for me on her blog. It always comfort me a little - just to know that at least I have her on my side even if it's just one person - (well, make it three because I am sure my parents are obliged by their parental duties to be on my side).

Friday, March 02, 2007

My Dear Cousin
Have I ever told you about my dear cousin, let's call her Giggles. Giggles and I grew up together, played in the same playpen, we fought, we played, we laughed, we competed but I'm proud to say up until today we are still best friends. Giggles with a head of beautiful curls and beautiful light pale skin that all Asians adore comes with a variety of Accessories. Giggles comes with a Great Fashion Sense, High Intelligence, Killer Shoes, and a Soft Heart. I know deep inside what Giggles wants and one day I hope and I know she will get her wish fufilled. I love my Giggles!

Isn't she sweet? Such a dearie....

One one-thousand, two one-thousand, three one-thousand.....three whole seconds...

Three full seconds - it seemed forever when I was in a full handstand (fully of the wall - no cheating by leaning my foot against it this time). That's the longest that I have held that pose (without cheating) - everything felt in place - totally aligned and I was completely upside down. Woohoo - seems like a small feat to others but a big breakthrough for me. If I can do that, nothing else is impossible (haha!). Plus, when I was inverted, my frown was turned upside down.

Narcissism

From my previous posts, I may appear to be a narcisstic invidual but sadly that's furthest from the truth. I have unhealthy tendencies to pick myself apart - finding every single flaw - fully examining and magnifying even the smallest flaw under the microscope. I could easily blame this on my highly critical mother or just the natural perfectionist predisposition of growing up as an only child but I take full responsibility of how I turn out since I am the one who make most of my life choices. If I am obsessed with only my flaws, how would others see me for other than my flaws. I am trying very hard to turn this around - to see what I can offer the world instead of what I have inconvenienced others with. Just trying to see what it's like to view the world as half-full than half-empty....

If I have a clothing line...

If I have a clothing line, it will be one that celebrates the strength and the beauty of feminity. My clothing line will feature the following:

• Sexy lingerie with soft-coloured lacy silk bras and boy shorts (yes I love these non-wedgie-inducing underwear). Dressing up starts from what's under the clothes - the right choice of lingerie can put one in the right frame of mind - yes, sexy frame of mind.
• Bikinis - every girl needs the flattering halter top/string bikini for that pool party or the fun hot-tubbing session. I can't even dog-paddle to save myself from drowning but I always pack a bikini for my trips for those just in case you need to have some fun in the hot tub session ;p
• Dresses - my clothing line will have lots of dresses. I love dresses - I have more dresses sitting in my closet than occassions to wear them. Pucci-esque, brightly coloured casual dresses for the hot summer day. Diane Von Fusternberg inspired dressed to take from work to evening look. Cute mod-inspired short dresses for coffee or shopping on the weekend. Soft-flowing chiffony dresses for those special occasions - i.e. a good friend's wedding.
• Skirts - those booty-flattering pencil skirts are the staple of any work wardrobe. I love these because they look very professional paired with a pair of heels and super-foxy (ala the naughty secretary).
• Blouses - yes, blouses not shirts (as shirts are for boys and blouses are for girls). Feminine silk blouses (not too frilly) paired with pencil skirts or the right pair of jeans can make every girl look like a bombshell.
• Cashmere sweaters/cardi's - the combination of cashmere and silk feel so divine on the skin. Fitted cashmere and sweaters can be so inviting to touches - hmm....soft cashmere. (Funny, how I instantly feel so safe and loved whenever I wear cashmere).
• Bags - soft-leathered bags big enough to carry an emergency umbrella and a pair of shoes is a must.

Ahh....so many more ideas but still no clothing line of my own. Until then, it'll be shop shop shop. (Speaking of shopping, I was excited to find out that there's actually an Urban Outfitters which just opened in town - yippee!).

Anyone care to offer seed money to get me started on my clothing line venture?

Arghhh.....frown lines!!!!

I really should stop my sulking and frowning because I am starting to develop frown lines on my forehead. I was so busy living miserably inside my head that I failed to take notice of the unattractive frown lines developing until my dear mom pointed them out to me over this weekend when I was visiting my parents. Arghhh....that should be the sign that I need to refocus on finding contentment in my life.

An inspiring yoga teacher once said that "we constantly look to the external in search of something that completes us but we should really look within ourselves to find what already complete us". Contentment - that is what completes us - not another pair of shoes (although that pair of killer heels could totally pull the outfit together with that complementing purse), or the spirit of another being (in the form of a very very good-looking guy - haha). If we look deep enough, we were already given the gifts to find happiness within our own spirit, within our own abilities, within our soul.

So...no more sulking and frowning...because I want to keep my youthful looks in my journey to find happiness and contentment.

Living life with an open heart

Living life with an open heart means exposing inside out of who we are - our strengths, our weaknesses, our vulnerabilities, our souls, our stories, our histories, ...

Living life with an open heart means being open to new experience, being fearless to charter into unexplored terrritories, being brave enough to take risks and sometimes even to take a leap of fate.

We know not what awaits us at the other end - sometimes we lands on a soft pillowy cushion, other times we crashed into cold hard concrete - garnering a few bruises, broken bones, and even scars.

Lately, I have been trying on different shades of glasses - in vain attempts to find one that gives me a clearer and brighter vision on life. One of the new approach is to try to live my life with an open heart (as foolish as it may be). There were moments where the sun shone brightly and enveloped me in its warmth. Those were times when friends and family share their moments of joy and happiness with me - I am thankful to them for their generousity. But there were many a times when I had fallen into the thorny rosebushes- getting too close to smell the sweet-smelling roses and admiring the pretty bloom. The pricks of the thorns were painful and I am still removing every little thorn that pierced me deeply from my many falls into the treacherous rosebush. Why do I still play around rosebushes?

Cupcake ;p

Freshly baked warm vanilla cupcake covered with glistening cream cheese frosting and topped with white flakes of coconut shaving - I can almost imagine the whiff of the coconuty vanilla aroma of the just out-of-the-oven cupcake. There it sits grandly - slightly larger than the palm of my hand - looking ever so pleasing to the eyes. I could imagine slowly peeling the paper lining an eighth of an inch at a time off the cake - completely seduced by the fluffiness of the cake. The tip of my tongue ever so faintly stole a lick of the frosting - mmm....sugary sensation travels from the tip to the rest of my tastebud. With newfound boldness I dive into sweet heaven by licking all the frosting cleanly off the cupcake - leaving it completely naked. I could just devour the whole cupcake in one big mouthful or should I slowly savour it nibble by nibble. To prolong the (eventual guilt-ridden) sugary experience, I think slow savouring is the way to go. Pensively nibbling the edges of the cake - ever so careful not to swallow it too quickly - allowing the moist texture of the cake crumbles to melt in my mouth. Nibble by nibble - crumble by crumble, the cupcake gradually disappears - satisfying every bit of my craving for a wholesome serving of dessert. ;p

I am honoured and privileged but unfortunately I would have to decline...

"I am honoured and privileged but unfortunately I would have to decline" - that is my polite way to decline all offers to be bridesmaid. The less than polite answer is "No way!" - for those who need a literal answer.

This is my official decline to all future offers to be bridesmaid. I feel very strongly about this issue and hopefully those who (even dare) think about asking me to be bridesmaid should respect my position on this issue. I will make no exception to the rule for anybody. I will, however, be thrilled to attend your wedding as a regular guest, instead.

The first and the last time I was made Maid of Honour/Bridesmaid at a wedding was a good experience. I was allowed to pick my own dress (which was beautiful by the way) and my responsibility to give a speech was waived. I doubt that anyone else would be willing to make those concessions - therefore, I refuse all future offers to be made bridesmaid.

Good luck in your bridesmaids search!

My happy place :)

My happy place is my yoga mat. Once my bare feet touch the mat, I leave all frustrations of reality behind and enter a magical world where I transform myself with grace into a dancer, a contortionist, a cirque performer, a playful child, or any character that I dream of being at that moment. On my mat, I explore the beauty of imitating the flora - like a tree firmly rooted on the ground yet reaching into the sky with ease like branches swaying to the light breeze of a cool summer evening. On my mat, I explore the animalistic ways of fauna - taking the likeness of a doggy wagging its tail out of gratitude, a bird taking flight with freedom, a monkey playfully testing its own physical boundaries with curiousity, etc.

Who needs recreational drug when there is yoga?

Namaste

What a tease ;P

Welcome to AssGoodAssItGets - my very own blog spot. I know it says "ass" but it is most certainly not an erotic nor a pornographic blog. The postings will hopefully be a reflection of my personality - naughty yet prudish. Wait ....does that make me a tease? ;P

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