Inspire me

Bhavagad Gita

2009-08-24T22:30:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was an auspicious day - t'was the day I first read the Bhagavad Gita. I was so drawn to it that I couldn't put it down until I completed it. My mind is till blown away by it - I need time to digest & contemplate what I have just read.

Wow...

Stark naked!

2009-01-27T21:03:00.001-08:00

Blogging and singing in public make me feel stark naked. It's as if I'm exposing my vulnerabilities, my private thoughts and all things secret. I hope my blogging and singing do not scare you away (akin to my naked state - haha).

South America

2009-01-16T11:49:00.000-08:00

The last big trip that I took was to South America (well, just Argentina & Brazil). I came back from that trip happy - more than usual and for the longest time I couldn't figure out why. Looking at pictures that I took during the trip, the commonality in those pictures were my frizzy hair, melted make-up, basic clothes and yet a silly grin. I think what rocked my happy boat on that trip were the following:

1. Renewed faith in people
Despite being a total foreign looking person in Buenos Aires, a sweet old lady who spoke only Spanish came up to us to offer her help with directions. We were just standing around the corner - studying our maps and she came up to me to offer her help. I spoke no Spanish and she spoke no English but somehow I understood what she was trying to convey to me through lots of hand gesturing.

A lady in a small resort town, Paraty in Brazil, gave me & my folks a ride back to our hotel when we found ourselves lost in town. We were merely asking for directions and she offered to drive us back to the hotel because it was a hot day.

2) Nature

The lush green that welcomed us as we flew into Iguassus was simply breathtaking. It was so beautiful and lush - now I finally understand the importance of forest conservation.

The Iguassus Falls was simply majestic and I am still in awe. Beautiful pure natural art!

3) Family

I travelled with my parents. It was so reassuring to know that we worked so well as a team - we spoke no local languages and yet we got by with just a map along with an open heart & mind to absorb our surroundings.

4) Local delights

Of course, food was also a highlight as always. Local ingredients made such delicious local dishes. I love those coconut water (agua de coco) and passion fruit juice (suco maracuja). Mmm....

Cracking open

2009-01-08T23:18:00.000-08:00

I had one of my headtrip, AHA moment, this morning. I think I may have what appeared (to me at least) the answer to the age-old question of "Who Am I? What is my purpose?" Well, (drumroll please), I am a spirit having a human experience and my purpose is to experience what human do and be fully present when experiencing a human moment. My purpose is to serve as a piece of the huge moving puzzle - the Universe.

For the longest time, my status single has been a huge part of what/who I identify myself as. Perhaps, I was grasping on to what feels safe and familiar - too scared to take the risk towards something that could promise more (or less - therefore a risk). I vow to strip away that "single" identity (or any other surface level identities) - leaving me naked (well, not literally) and allow my spirit the freedom to experience fully the human experiment. Come what may...

Another day - another mantra to live by

2009-01-01T18:59:00.000-08:00

I share with you the Anusara invocation (the very mantra that I vow to put forth my best effort to live every moment by).

ॐ नमः शिवय गुरवे
Om Namah Shivaya Gurave
I offer myself to Lord Shiva, the Auspicious One, who is the True Teacher within and without,

सचिदनन्द मुतयै
Saccidananda Murtaye
Who assumes the forms of Reality, Consciousness, and Bliss,

निसपपचय शनतय
Nishprapanchaya Shantaya
Who is never absent and is full of peace,

निरलमबय तेजसे
Niralambaya Tejase
Independent in existence, the vital essence of Illumination.

ॐ
Om

Cross promotion or self-plug?

2008-12-30T23:05:00.000-08:00

Dear Blog,

I am sorry for having been unfaithful to thee. Lately, I have been spending time and effort writing a separate blog (http://iloveburningloins.blogspot.com/). I promise to not neglect you in the new year and will continue to nourish you with fanciful stories. I hope you forgive me and let us continue our creative relationship.

Yours truly

Sweet ananda

2008-12-16T16:45:00.001-08:00

This is why we need to care about our environment - to preserve the beauty of nature. {I feel incredibly lucky for the opportunity to visit the Iguassu Falls a month ago & sharing that moment with my parents}

Squeeze

2008-12-06T15:25:00.000-08:00

According to Dr. Wayne Dyer (the spiritual guru behind the Power of Intentions), you get orange juice if you squeeze an orange.

If I am squeezed tight, I hope to ooze pure joy & lots of laughs.

C-span just got interesting...

2008-12-02T23:07:00.001-08:00

To those who claim that Canadian politics is a snooze may wish to wake up to the possible political coup that is brewing. I must say I am quite impressed with those responsible of the "coalition" for thinking outside the box in the attempts of taking down the governing party. How about using that creative minds instead for boosting confidence in the current economic state?

Just a thought

2008-11-26T21:04:00.000-08:00

Just a thought - instead of adding one year to my age when my next birthday rolls around, how about adding one year to the year that I was born. Brilliant?

One vote

2008-09-11T22:06:00.000-07:00

I reserve my one vote for the political leader who can show me how he can serve the country best - not how much critism he can throw at his opponent. I am sick and tired of negative campaigning. Is this how we set an example for young children - the way to win is to make someone else look bad? Instead of focusing energy and resources in attacking each other, why not tell us what your strengths are and how best you can make our country one of the best places to live in the world? You tell me and maybe I'll give you my one vote.

Bourdain vs DiSprito

2008-08-26T23:05:00.000-07:00

I enjoyed the past banters between Anthony Bourdain and Rocco DiSprito. I wonder what Bourdain has to say about DiSprito appearance on the next instalment of Dancing with the Stars...

The understatement of simplicity

2008-08-26T22:40:00.000-07:00

How will London top Beijing's extravagant display of the Olympics? In my opinion, London (and Vancouver) should just have a minimalistic and simple Olympic event focusing on going "green". Instead of spending billions of dollars on a two week show, perhaps it may be beneficial to simplify the event and spend the money on different causes (i.e. feed the hungry, sponsor free education for children of the world). Simplicity could be the new direction of making a statement.

Vegan condom?

2008-08-25T16:57:00.000-07:00

Who knew there is special condom for vegan? I didn't know that until I saw it on Tyra's show. Phew! Now I guess I can widen my dating pool to include vegans. :p

Why I fawn over JM....

2008-08-21T22:49:00.000-07:00

I enjoy his musical talents, his boyish good looks (despite his often face contortions), but most of all I get a kick out of his point of view:

"I guarantee you [that] 20 percent of the people on this street right now who are in a relationship wish they could get out but they don't know how. And I'm going to be honest on the way in to my relationships, and I'm going to be honest on the way out of my relationships." - John Mayer

Note to JM - I can be your wonderland....

Zzzz

2008-08-11T16:49:00.000-07:00

On my stroll back to the office on my lunch break today, I walked past a mattress store. Plastered on the window of the store was posters advertising "Back to School" sale. Since when do kids ask for new mattresses in preparation of the new school year?

Feast for my eyes

2008-08-09T16:02:00.000-07:00

Let the games begin (and the feasting for my eyes start) - the Olympic games bring about the abundance of wonderfully athletic physiques. So far, I'm thankful for men beach volleyball, swimming and soccer. Hmm....what's next on the menu? (Note to IOC - can't you have the summer games more frequent than once every four years?)

Worth

2008-08-07T22:06:00.000-07:00

Walking towards one of my favourite casual Italian restaurant, a homeless guy muttered to me as he jay-walked across the street "don't cross - I'm different, my life is worthless". He cautioned us as we tried to follow suit jay-walking across the street. This led me to ponder - what really is the worth of my life?

Shh......

2008-07-28T21:32:00.000-07:00

Yoga does feel really good when done right - but moaning? I was at yoga class on Saturday afternoon and during class, this couple with mats lined up next to mine started to moan during class. It was not a couple's yoga class - it was individual practice and therefore, there was no need for moaning (although I doubt that moaning is ever appropriate at yoga). I must have had this puzzled and disturbed look on my face because the teacher came to my rescue and requested the class to "resist from vocalization" during postures. Phew, hot yoga teacher saved the day again.

Ogre riding the unicorn

2008-06-18T21:04:00.000-07:00

This ogre still dreams the dream of riding the unicorn. Unicorns are for princesses but someday in a far far away land, this ogre will get meet a unicorn who will offer her a ride and together we will ride off into the sunset (& laughing all the way into the horizon).

Invisible or Ogre? Take your pick

2008-06-09T00:09:00.001-07:00

In this beautiful city I live in where beautiful women outnumbered men, I have often been reduced to feeling as if I am an ogre or simply invisible by the hetero single men. Isn't it a man's job to make a woman feel beautiful and a woman's job to make a man feel strong? Apparently my expectation is old-fashion and out of style - either that or my mirror really is magical (because the last I check I don't look so bad).

I simply don't know

2008-05-20T16:56:00.000-07:00

A little comforting quote that I came across:

"Those who think they know, don't! But those that acknowledge that they don't know always create space for greater knowing to come about"

Clean slate?

2008-05-14T21:58:00.000-07:00

Having lost my authentic self - does it mean I get a clean slate?

Mirror

2008-05-13T16:51:00.001-07:00

Do you see yourself through the reflections of others or do you see yourself from within?

Lost soul

2008-05-12T22:30:00.000-07:00

Warning: Do not read any further if you don't want your world to be rocked a little.

This morning I woke up feeling sad, alone and terrified - I do not know who I am and what my purpose is. I know the basic facts about me (i.e. my name, lineage, address, date of birth, and so on) but facts only addressed what I am - not who I am. I know my roles - a daughter, a friend, and an employee in the financial industry - but roles explained my functions but not who I am. Constantly haunting me over the past few weeks have been this particular cold, empty, and alone feeling - which I can't quite shake off. The only times I feel somewhat comforted were times spent at the yoga studio, in the company of true friends, and with my parents.

Do you know who you are and what your purposes are? Or am I the only....

Let's hope that it's the full moon that's behind this whole feeling of being lost...

Old-fashion

2008-05-09T16:55:00.000-07:00

True to my old-fashion style, I love receiving hand-written notes. Amongst my bills and statements, I was greeted by a lovely hand written note card from Speedy Granny. Speedy Granny is one of the dearist person I am so lucky to know - we call her Speedy Granny because she is very experienced and she drives fast. She is the queen of notecards - she sends them all the time and I love receiving them. I am supposed to visit her at the end of the month when I'm out in Toronto but unfortunately Speedy Granny will not be in town. She sent me a note just to let me know how disappointed that we couldn't have tea together.

In this age of technology whereby txt messages have replaced real phone conversation, and e-mails have replaced hand-written letters, it is so refreshing and sweet to receive a hand-written note.

Ctrl + Z

2008-05-08T17:04:00.000-07:00

Don't you sometimes (or a lot of times) wish that Ctrl+Z work in real life? Undo, undo, undo - nope doesn't work.

Split second

2008-05-07T21:42:00.000-07:00

A split second, I turn & I see a smile
A split second, I turn & I see a scowl
A split second, I listen & I hear laughter
A split second, I listen & I hear sobs
A split second, I breathe & I feel stinging chills
A split second, I breathe & I feel caressing warmth
A split second, a moment of joy or a moment of sadness
A split second, a moment neither too soon nor too late

Bubble bath?

2008-05-06T17:05:00.000-07:00

I saw a notice in the elevator of my building today advising against the use of bubble bath products in the hot tub and pool. Hmm....I wonder what kind of people do live in my building? (Why wasn't I invited to the giant bubble bath party?)

Short shorts

2008-05-04T22:52:00.001-07:00

Gasp!!! Yes, I said short shorts and I am taking back my words on what I had previously said about short shorts. If they are cuffed, they actually look fine. I bought two pair of short shorts today after many years of staying far far away from them. I tried them on and they look cute-ish; so I bought them. Next time you see me, I may be wearing them. Just wear shades so that I don't blind you with my pale legs.

I get sick too :(

2008-05-02T17:08:00.000-07:00

A robot I am not but falling apart is never an option. Despite being weakened by a nasty cold, I masked my illness under some make-up and put on my best dress - and brave the scary cruel world alone (but with poise still intact).

I want to colour too!

2008-05-01T16:58:00.000-07:00

I want to colour and colour with every colour of crayon in the box too! I'll even colour outside the line - for kicks!
Too bad - there is nothing to colour on :(

PS - Definitely looking forward to the SATC movie.

Is there ever a sexy disease?

2008-04-30T21:26:00.000-07:00

Feeling lousy (after crashing into a brick wall last week), I decided to start on beautification project. So, I decided to head to the doctor's office to remedy my skin irritation problem which had been plaguing me for a while. While waiting to be placed with a skin specialist, my doctor prescribed me a cream to ease my irritance for now.

After yoga, I headed down to the neighbourhood pharmacy to get my prescription filled. To assist me was a very cute Asian pharmacist - too bad I am not getting a prescription for a sexy disease. But is there really a sexy disease (I said sexy, not sex!).

Do's & Don'ts - The Spinter's Guide to Surviving Lonely Nights and Days

2008-04-26T17:02:00.001-07:00

Do's

Do wear good underwear - always wear good underwear. If you are ever found lying unconscious alone in your apartment, at least you have good underwear on when the paramedics/firemen come to your rescue.
Do allow yourself to belt out the spinster theme song "All By Myself" - good cathartic release of pent-up energy.
Do yoga - it's my solution to all problems. Plus, it's the best substitute for sex (better than chocolate because it does not make you fat).
Do celebrate your own divinity - if you don't, who else would?
Do splurge on luxury bedding and lots of pillows - I feel safe cocooned by mountains of pillows.
Do chores (i.e. vacuuming) in sexy underwear - when else do you get to use those? Don't waste it - it's cooling to do chores in underwear.
Do blog - you still have a voice, put it out there.
Do self-indulge - treat yourself well.

Don'ts

Do not keep cats at home. In case you fall unconscious, the cats may eat your face.
Do not stuff your face in a tub of ice cream. Never let yourself go even if you feel undesirable - at the end of the day, you still have to look at yourself in the mirror and feel super hot.
Do not drink yourself silly (hmm...maybe unless you completely pass out from the consumption).
Do not watch romantic movies or tv shows - stop reminding yourself of that elusive prince who chose to frolic with the young'uns instead of finding his way to you.
Do not befriend the neighbour except for the sweet old friendly couple.
Do not let anyone tell you that you're a lesser being because you're partnerless.

No judgement please

2008-04-25T17:02:00.000-07:00

I live my life the best way I know how - at times seem totally frivolous and self-indulgence. We all have different circumstances (none better than the other) - at the end of the day, all I want is to be serene and have a good night sleep. Reserve your judgement until you walk in my stilletoes or ballet flats - flying solo is not as easy as it seems.

Unexplained

2008-04-24T22:07:00.000-07:00

I have spent much time frivolously trying to figure out how things in life really works - and my conclusion is simply: unexplained.

Uniquely favorable

2008-04-18T18:03:00.000-07:00

"Tell your new friend something unique about yourself that you like" - when asked to do that before the start of yesterday's yoga class, I was stumped. I couldn't think of something unique about myself that I like. I had, however, a ready list of items that I don't like about myself. Sigh - how sad.

One day late, the unique quality that I like about myself is I still have my child-like curiousity.

My cheer-me up mantra

2008-04-17T17:05:00.000-07:00

Here's my new cheer-me-up mantra:

I have food in my tummy and shelter over my head; everything else is icing on the cake.

Spirituality & the Corporate world

2008-04-16T16:40:00.000-07:00

Spirituality is a BIG business - for instance, just look at the $$$ reaped in by the popularity of the "Secret" or the "New Earth".

I am however having a challenging time trying to fit my spirituality into the Corporate world. Each attempt I was reminded by the horror of my experience in business school. There was once in a business class, the instructor asked "what are we all striving for?" and when he looked at my direction, I answered "self actualization - be the very best that we can & each one of us is different in terms of our potential". Laughter bursted out across the room - of course encouraged by the smug instructor who responded "this is a business class, not a psych class".

So, when my boss asked me to think of goals that I would like to set for myself for the upcoming fiscal year - I doubt that my plan of "going with the flow of the Universe and let myself be pleasantly surprised" is not going to fly.

PS: Single people are entitled to happiness too

2008-04-15T17:19:00.000-07:00

At a dinner party back in January, my dinner companions looked at me strangely because I was grinning from ear to ear. They proceeded to interrogate me and the first thing they asked was "so who's the new guy?" Umm - there was no new guy (and still no guy). Then they asked "why are you so happy?" Umm - perhaps it was because I had a pretty dress on and just about to have a delicious meal with interesting dinner company - not good enough reasons to be joyful?

PS - Single folks are fully capable of finding joy in things other than f$%# the next guy/girl.

An AHA - OMG moment....

2008-04-14T17:01:00.000-07:00

I had a mind-blowing epiphany today (what I called a AHA-OMG moment). The mind-blowing epiphany I had was the revelation that my destiny (or journey in life) is predetermined by the Universe (or by God - the big force).
[This may be my last phase of sanity - before I go completely crazy - by society expectations]

The revelation is not a new concept. It was foreshadowed by a friend's tale of a visit to a Chinese fortune-teller. According to the Chinese fortune-teller, the life path is predetermined. Every being has a unique destiny. No two beings enter the Universe at the same moment and place, therefore no two beings have identical journeys. When she first told me about it, I didn't give it much thought.

I finally understood it all as a result of the events that unfolded today. I had been working on starting a special project for the last few weeks with much frustrations and a heck lot of disappointments. No matter what I did or how much I effort I put into it - somehow there was always something that stalled the start of the project. After abandoning the project for a week (without a break from trying to figure it out), I made a last ditch effort today in attempts to get the project started. All seems to be heading in the right direction until the last second when the project was called off again. That's when I had my Aha-OMG moment - no matter what I do, I was not destined to work on this special project. The great force (i.e. the Universe or God) is preventing my involvement in this special project. The reason the opportunity came into my life (but not being part of it - which seems very pointless at first) is that this was to reinforce the notion that my destiny is predetermined. Every time I stray away from the path, I was directed back by the great force.

The lesson that I learned is that my destiny is already mapped out for me the moment I entered the universe. Each time I tried to change my destiny I have experienced much frustrations and disappointments. Each time I went with the flow I have experienced ease and effortlessness.

What does this all mean? Does it mean that since my destiny is predetermined, I am just going to do nothing and give up? Absolutely not. I may not be able to change my destiny but every thing that I do or choose to be conscious of is guided by the force. Not knowing what comes next makes every moment in life so much more exciting. I try to be more conscious and aware of my surroundings and sensations that I experience because these may foreshadow what's to come. The way to live is to trust my gut instincts - it is the Universe whispering to me what my next move is. I am excited to be pleasantly surprised by the unfolding of events in my destiny. I'll continue to let my faith grow and wear cute underwear.

Talk about inspirational...

2008-04-10T23:01:00.000-07:00

I admit I was slow in catching on to the phenomenon of "The Last Lecture" by Randy Pausch. I had heard about this for a while but never watched the lecture until a few minutes ago. If you have 76 mins 26 sec, watch it - if you don't, make time and watch it. It is truly inspiring.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo

A tax reform I would like to see...

2008-04-03T16:42:00.000-07:00

I would like to see a tax reform that favours the single people for a change. One where one gets a tax credit or at least a deudction for maintaining a household on a single income. A single person pays 100% of living costs on a single income whereareas a couple shares the costs on a double income. Fair? I think not. To make matters worse, a couple gets a spousal deduction (gasp!).

Another full moon evening....

2008-03-22T01:02:00.000-07:00

As I was strolling home (from yoga) on a busy shopping street, I overheard a sad self-muttering of a homeless older gentleman. He was muttering to himself how much his life sucks. My heart broke when I heard that - how very sad for this being. I am feeling guilty for not stopping to offer him something. I hope at least next time I will be more prepared to at least offer him some food. The homeless gentleman may think that his life no longer has meaning but he still make a difference - at least one in me - thanks to him, I am grateful to have food in my tummy, shelter over my head, and love of family and friends.

Pout

2008-03-13T21:15:00.001-07:00

Help! I am looking for mint-flavoured lip gloss. My favourite lip gloss - Empowermint by Philosophy has since been discontinued. I checked with Kiehl but they only carry mint gloss around Christmas - so no luck there. I did pick up two tubes of peppermint gloss from Green by Nature at Urban Outfitters but they are my last two tubes.

I like the tingly feeling and the minty taste of my favourite gloss. Please e-mail me if you do come across mint-flavoured gloss. Thanks!

SoBe it

2008-03-10T22:02:00.000-07:00

South Beach - wishing that I am still laying on the beach, chilling to the Atlantic ocean breeze but reality is that I have left SoBE for more than a week now (sigh).

My vices in Miami were food, shoppping, and a whole lot of lazing around.

Things that I fell in love with are

1)

Beautiful beach - need I say more?

2) Cuban espresso - hot aromatic espresso dripped onto a bed of sugar, caramelizing the sugar thus creating a sweet aroma. Best when served over ice.

3) Food at Table 8 - especially the famous "grilled cheese sandwich with pulled pork". I was so impressed by the food that I was hoping to meet Chef Govind Armstrong. Shamelessly I asked if I could meet the chef but sadly he had already left for LA (I was one week too late).

4) Stone crab at Joe's - where I lunched with the mafias and the ladies who lunch, looking "fresh" and accessorized with their limited edition Dior bags and blinding diamond rings.

5) Cuban cuisine at Larios on the Beach and Puerto Sagua - just thinking about the empanadas, sopa de pollo, ropa vieja, moro rice, pork adobo, & of course the plaintain makes my mouth waters and my tummy growls.

6) Pastries at Thomas (on Lincoln Road) - pastries that transport me to Paris.

7) Fancy decor at La Marea - I felt like a celebrity lunching there but was left unimpressed by the food (I think the Chef forgot to season our food).

8) Best pizza at Pizza Rustica - the "Rustica" was delicious.

9) LF Miami - a little boutique on 8th Street between Collins & Washington Avenue that carries chic clothes & shoes from Europe. Sadly I only discovered this little treasure box on my last evening in town (even though our hotel was just around the corner on Collins by 8th).

10) Artwork by Romero Britto - what colorful, vibrant, playful artwork.

I had a fantastic time in South Beach - wishing I am still there....

40 days completed - only the beginning

2008-02-17T23:23:00.000-08:00

Last Friday, I finally completed my 40 days challenge - woohoo! What am I going to do with myself now?

Well, I am glad that I embarked on the 40 day journey - to self discovery, self revelation, and mostly self love. Who knew from doing yoga, meditating, and indulging in nourishing food, I learn to be excited about living life again (instead of merely existing). I am now better at letting go of control and just going with the flow - letting the natural order of universe brings me pleasant surprises. I have faith in the Universe again - I trust that the Universe will guide me well. In the midst of the journey, I stop fighting change but welcome change - I even took the risk of changing jobs (I start my new job in the first week of March).

The 40 days may be over but the journey continues....

(Perhaps the Universe will allow me to cross path with Lenny Kravitz again...in South Beach next week).

40 Day Challenge Update - Week 3

2008-01-28T17:01:00.000-08:00

Still going....

Upside - my skirt feels roomier.

Downside - I am exhausted (to the point that I bailed out on my friends on Saturday night - sorry guys).

40 Day Challenge Update - Week 2

2008-01-21T17:01:00.001-08:00

I have just completed my second week of the 40 day challenge and I have not given up yet.

Asana Practice (Physical)
Physically, I was starting to feel the wear & tear of yoga more so in the second week than the first. Plus, the fact that I had to wake up earlier this week than last week did not help matters. The upside of a tired body was a good night sleep. Much better sleep this week.

Meditation
The duration of each meditation session was increased from 5 to 10 minutes this week. The first day (Monday) of each week was always the hardest. I have yet to learn the proper technique of meditation since my mind wandered for most part of the meditation sessions. Oh well, at least I fought my desire to fidget.

Food
Too much seafood this week left me feeling chilly. Time to eat meat again to heat up the body. The highlight of the week was having a fine dinner on Saturday which included dessert. Hmm...I would be so happy if I could have fine dining every day.

Overall
I had a mini personal breakthrough at the end of the second week. As I was driving to my parents’ on Sunday morning, it finally clicked in my brain – I finally was able to acknowledge my own divinity. In the past, I have depended on others to acknowledge my “divinity” and somewhere along that line I got lost and started to fall in the trap of feeling unworthiness and losing the value of self. Lesson learned - I first acknowledge and recognize my own divinity and then I can let my divinity shine out to others.

Personal Revolution - Week 1 Review

2008-01-14T17:02:00.000-08:00

I made it through my first week of the 40 day challenge. It was difficult to wake up an hour earlier than usual (and the wake-up time gets earlier and earlier as the weeks progress).

Asana Practices (Physical)
To practice yoga six days a week wasn't a stretch for me (yet) since I do practice yoga regularly from three to six times a week. I find balancing the daily practice with social life (the lack of that currently helps with the program) to be the real test.

Meditation
As I have a mind full of constant chatters, it wasn't easy for me to sit still for 5 minutes at a time (without fidgeting or thinking about food). 5 minutes felt like forever one the first day but manageable by the last day.

Food
I have been good in terms of avoiding any preservatives and eating mostly home-made food (except for the weekend that I let myself indulged - wasn't at all smart since I gained back all the weight that I lost throughout the week from the weekend binge).

Overall
I was glad that I started this journey because it definitely helped me deal with all the "craziness" that went on last week. Net weight lost - just 1 lb. Frame of mind - good.

Om Namah Shivaya

2008-01-07T17:02:00.000-08:00

Om Namah Shivaya - I honor the divinity that resides within me

Today, I embarked on a 40 day personal revolution (based on a book by famed yogi Baron Baptiste). The program involves a commitment to daily meditation, six days of yoga practice per week and healthy eating. I am excited to discover what this journey will uncover throughout the next six weeks.

Festive Dressing

2007-12-21T11:15:00.000-08:00

I am so excited that I get to wear my favourite Christmas sweater – thick cable knit wool in festive crimson featuring Rudolph in front. What makes the sweater so special is Rudolph’s blinking red nose – yes, it actually lights up and especially useful at night. I am planning to pair the sweater this year with candy-cane striped tights and brown booties. I can just see it – how cute I will be. Do you have a favourite Christmas sweater?

Seriously, can you picture me stepping out of the door in such fashion? I do take on fashion risk but the Christmas sweater fashion risk is way too high for my comfort zone.

Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays! Eat lots, drink lots, shop lots and be merry.

Namaste

‘Tis the season of receiving?

2007-12-14T11:19:00.000-08:00

The streets and the malls are now bustling with people frantically doing their Christmas shopping – everyone is focusing on giving in hopes of receiving. Personally, I have done most of my Christmas shopping (for self – of course, and also others) in November. The point of this post is not to rub this fact in but to explore the acts of giving and receiving.

Strangely, I find the act of receiving to be much more challenging than the act of giving. This deviation from the norm led me to many pondering moments in search for an explanation. When I give, I give without expecting anything in return – I give in hopes of bringing a brief moment of joy to the receiver as well as to myself. Therefore, giving is easy – my job is done once the gift has been received. However, receiving often makes me uneasy (especially from people other than my parents) – it brings suspicions to mind (what are the motives and expectations of the giver behind the gift). I often feel the need to return the favour – i.e. the job doesn’t end at receiving. One spiritual explanation may perhaps be that I do not feel as if I fully deserve such gift – but selfishly, I, in turn, deny the giver of the pleasure of giving. I am aware of my shortcomings when it comes to receiving but I am making a conscious effort to open myself up to receive everything good that is to come to me (and to do so with style and grace).

p.s. By Christmas day, I should be ready. So dear Mr. Santa, what will you bring to me for being a very good girl this year?

Bootie - A fashion do or a fashion don't?

2007-12-11T12:57:00.000-08:00

Subconsciously channeling my inner rock goddess (after my chance run-in with Mr. Lenny Kravitz), I recently purchased a pair of black bootie without any idea on how to wear it. The outlook for successfully pulling of the rock-star glam look appeared gloom after reading fashion articles which none recommend booties for those who are built the way I am – short & not svelte. Fighting buyer’s remorse, I had resorted to wearing my bootie with black leggings or black opaque tights – making every attempt to elongate and not to truncate. (Although at times the booties make me look like an elf – oh well, as least I am befitting the holiday season).

Fashion puzzlement

2007-12-05T17:04:00.000-08:00

Recently, there were two fashion risks that completely baffled me.

Firstly, short shorts (or hot pants) at work Christmas party. I was at a friend's work Christmas party last weekend and I noticed two young ladies (in their early 20's) donning hot pants at the event. I could understand wearing hot pants to an MTV award event but work Christmas party? (Well, I guess it's ok if you were playing the role of an elf at the party but trust me there were no dressed up Santa or Elves at the party).

Secondly, skinny young Asian (by Asian I mean Oriental and by Oriental I mean Mandarin speaking) guys carrying designer ladies tote bags. I was pretty sure they weren't carrying their girlfriends purses because there weren't any girls accompanying them. Yes, I understand that the tote bag can be highly functional and also serves as a status symbol (since they were designers') but they are meant for ladies - no masculine qualities to these purses at all.

I am baffled by these fashion risks taken - or maybe I am just jealous of those who have fab legs to carry off short shorts and and also those who splurges on extravagant designer purses.

Christmas Shopping

2007-11-23T15:48:00.000-08:00

The US Thanksgiving marks the beginning of Christmas shopping. Over the weekend, I saw a news piece on Christmas shopping budget and I found it to be quite a useful guideline. It was recommended that the Christmas shopping budget to be set at the equivalent of three days worth of net take home pay. I think that is a fair guideline. I wonder if that budget includes gifts for self - if so, I think I may have alreay blown mine budget for this Christmas.

Finding your centre

2007-11-22T22:34:00.000-08:00

If your centre is strong, every pose becomes easier. Another yoga philosophy that applies off the mat too.

I left my heart in San Francisco

2007-11-20T16:16:00.000-08:00

One of the upside of being single and having no commitment is to be able to pick up and escape from the city on a whim. This past weekend, I took advantage of the very few perks left to a single girl and booked a last minute trip to San Francisco on a Friday morning at work for the immediate weekend. I was lucky that my mom was available to come away with me. On Friday after work, I went home and threw a few items into my traveling bag and off I went to Richmond for a few hours of sleep at my parents’ before catching the 7:30 Saturday morning flight to SF.

Day 1

We arrived at our hotel in SF at around 10 am and lucky enough, the kind gentleman at the Grand Hyatt gave us an early check-in so that we can freshen up before embarking on our adventures. I highly recommend the hotel with its convenient location at the corner of Union Square (on Stockton and Post). The beds had potential to surpass the heavenly beds from the Westin only if they had used sheets of higher thread-counts (said the sheet snob - haha).

We strolled to Chinatown on the sunny Saturday and took in the sights of what was considered stereotypical Chinese to North American. We stopped off for lunch at a dim sum restaurant with cheesy décor and awful food. Disappointed by the food, we ate little and left the “Jackie Chan Hollywood movie set design” décor restaurant. As we made our way along Chinatown, we saw a line-up outside a Chinese bakery - Golden Gate Bakery. Out of curiosity, we joined the line-up and ended up tasting the best egg/custard tarts ever (the line-up was well worth it).

We continued our stroll on that fine day to Italy town in North Beach and decided to enjoy Italian coffee to wash down that yummy custard tart. The trees lining the street reminded me of the trees in Rome. After coffee, we continued our stroll all the way down to the Fisherman’s Wharf where we checked out the seafood stands and the view of Alcatraz. Despite still being full from lunch, I couldn't resist an In-and-Out burger and shared one with my mom. Yumm....

We found the Steve & Barry store around the corner - what luck: the store just opened this month. Steve & Barry is a store that carries budget fashion line by Sarah Jessica Parker, Amanda Bynes and just last week, Venus Williams. A fan of budget clothing, I was disappointed in the quality and style of the Bitten line by SJP - let's say they could lower the price further for what they offered.

Cold and tired from all the walking, we decided to go back to Union Square and decided to catch the cable car instead of walking back. The wait for the cable car was almost an hour long and it was freezing cold by then. As cheesy and as touristy as it seemed, the cable car was still a fun ride (yes, I am a big fan of cheesy touristy activity).

My mom decided to head back to the hotel which by then was around 7 pm but I couldn't resist checking out the shopping scene which was taunting me with all the Sale signs. I browsed around for another couple of hours before getting take-outs from Cheesecake Factory and finally called it a day/night.

Day 2

Day 2 was shopping day. We pretty much shopped all day until we couldn't shop anymore. Despite being a shopaholic, I do reach a certain point where I can't shop anymore. We had early dinner at Roy's - fusion Hawaiian chain restaurant which was introduced to me by my cousin M when we were in OC last year. The chocolate souffle was a nice end to a delightful dinner.

Day 3

Time to head back home. We were chauffeured to the airport by the house towncar - an upgrade from a taxicab. As always, our flight was delayed which gave us a chance to take our time with lunch. As I was eating my lunch, I looked up and saw a very stylish hunk in skinny jeans carrying two Gucci bags walked by. Lo and behold - the hunk was the divine Mr. Lenny Kravitz. That was the moment where I left my heart in San Francisco - my duct-taped heart was left with Mr. Kravitz, of course unbeknownst to him. Ahhh.....

Reason why we need TV writers

2007-11-14T15:16:00.000-08:00

Best line from the best TV show:

"No pro-bono for boning the pro" - Nip/Tuck

The Way I see It #287

2007-11-06T12:57:00.000-08:00

I am not one who usually reads what's on my Starbucks cup - all I care about is caffeine and taste. But this morning, I had a good chuckle when I read what's on my cup:

There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women.
– Madeleine K. Albright (Diplomat)

It was as if the universe was sending me a message about the plight of those who hate with no good reason through my morning joe.

Chosen one?

2007-11-05T12:09:00.000-08:00

On my way to work this morning, I was approached by two religious representatives trying to recruit me. I wonder - did I look like I desperately need to be "saved" or my ultra-conservative apparel today gave the impression of a poster child for religion?

Senseless hurting....no?

2007-11-01T20:32:00.000-07:00

Yes, I am aware that blogging about work is the ultimate no-no according to the rules of blogging. But, as a human with feelings (yes, a feeling human who hurts), I need an outlet to vent my frustration.

It came to my attention that a lady at work had verbally expressed (not to me) that she does not get along with me and a few other colleagues. In my head (a drama queen's mind), this all translated into the lady having hatred issue against me. Of course, the first thing I did after hearing of such news was to run through my head trying very hard to think of what I could have possibly done to the lady for her to harbour such ill-feelings against me, and I came up with nothing. I had very few interactions with the lady as our functions in the office do not require much interactions between the two roles. I am merely a quiet mouse at work - never wanting to ruffle any feathers and trying my best (in spite of bad days) to be pleasant to all. And here I am despite all my good intention, I was being hated.

Naive as I am in wishing for peace and bliss in my surroundings, I wished that the lady would have confronted us (the ones she hates) instead of salicious attempts to defame our good names to others. Senseless hurting....no?

Eternal Life

2007-10-31T22:07:00.000-07:00

What a fantastic treat I had on this Halloween to enjoy a class with one of my favourite yoga teachers (who rarely teaches on the regular schedule). My always inspiring teacher shared with us the meaning of "eternal life". People in our past and present eternally exist in our lives in the way that they have influenced and touched us - may it be a positive or negative experience. These influences show itself in the way we act, in the things we say, in the choice we make, and the way we view life. Unbeknownst to us, no matter how insignificant we think our actions are - like a simple smile or nod of acknowledgement - we may change another person's view of life for the day.

"No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main" - John Donne

Note to self: Time to turn the switch back on to living as opposed to existing; time to open up and reconnect to people new and old; time to stop being afraid of disappointments; time to take risk and give myself opportunities of possible pleasantries.

30 strangers challenge?

2007-10-29T17:05:00.000-07:00

Those who know me well know that I am shy. You would think that by my age I would have been able to overcome my social shortcoming but I still have trouble shaking it off. I have been prescribed an exercise (by those of my friends who are social butterflies) but have been putting it off. The exercise is for me to initiate and exchange small talks with strangers. It is an easy task for many but for me it is terrifying (I know...I suck).

Anyway, as an incentive for carrying out the task, I have decided to sweeten the bitterness of the deal and more importantly to make myself take the steps to overcome my shyness. So, for every thirty strangers that I exchange small talks with, I shall reward myself by buying a gift that comes in a little blue box wrapped in white bow.

I hope this works - because I really really like things that comes in those darn blue little boxes.

Wish me luck...

Album Name: You + Me = Together Forever

2007-10-25T13:50:00.000-07:00

I am not one who blogs about dating/relationship matters – as most of you are already aware of what a disaster I am when it comes to this particular subject matter. However, my colleague – let’s call her HH for her Hollywood Hair – suggested that I blog about a topic we often laugh about - “mix-tape” situations. We coined the term “mix-tape” to refer to any cheesy “romantic” gesture that one pulls on one’s object of affection prematurely in the very early stage of dating (perhaps from date one to five) which often results in the object of affection running for the door. So far, our list of “mix-tape” situations consists of the following:

Le Classic: making a mixed CD of “our” songs for your date with a picture of both of you on the cover
Le Martha: bringing him baked goods on the first date in a Martha style presentation
Le Invasion: moving your beauty supplies into his bathroom medicine cabinet
Le Surprise: showing up at his workplace with a picnic basket filled with lunch goodies
Le Text: texting every five minutes to tell him how much you miss him
Le Pet: adding his last name to your pet’s first name
Le Family: inviting him to a family function to meet mom and dad
Le Facebook: changing your relationship status on Facebook to “in a relationship” and tagged him on it

To my dear readers: Don’t you worry - Yours truly have not committed any of the “mix-tape” offences as described above….yet. Oh yeah, and neither has HH (she wanted me to add that in).

If you wish to share your “mix-tape” situations, I’ll love to hear them - send them my way.

Nirvana?

2007-10-23T20:27:00.000-07:00

Yoga has always been a source of happiness for me. But today at class, the teacher opened up new possibilities during the camel pose when she urged us to imagine "reaching your pubes to your mouth". Hmm...could that be the road to nirvana?

p.s. Of course, I couldn't hold in my giggles in class when my teacher spoke those words.

The eternal optimist?

2007-10-22T17:10:00.000-07:00

I had a lousy week last week. The growing list of wrongs rotted away what little faith and hope that I had in the universe – as a non-worshipper of religion, I am of the view that the universe has mystical forces which govern life (and no, I do not believe in unicorns). Last week, the universe was unkind to me – I was called fat by a stranger, honked at by a rude driver, sidelined from yoga due to a pulled back muscle, and “lost” my house-key. I did find my “lost” key yesterday (after making double-trip to my parents’ for spare key) – which I hope is the turn of the tide from wrongs to rights. Does this mean that in store for me this week will be a healthy pain-free back? a wave from a polite driver? compliment from a stranger?

Unnecessary Evil

2007-10-17T09:31:00.000-07:00

I willed myself to walk to work this morning despite my very sore back and I was greeted by the up-most unpleasantness of an extremely rude driver. The driver of a black sedan (BC licence plate 164 WDF), a lady with blown out dark chocolate shoulder length hair – about size 10 figure (BMI – not normal), unnecessarily honked at me as I was trying to cross the little side street outside my home. Her thoughtlessness not only angered me but saddened me – I am sad that people still choose to be unkind to others over nothing – a few seconds ahead in traffic will not get you far (,dear lady). I hope this lady curbed her evil ways before she is met by her own match – someone who is much less docile than I am – then she will be very sorry for her ways.

Even as docile as I am, I did wish that I had yogurt with me this morning to fling at her car.

Size 0 Nation - or in my culture, Size 00(0)

2007-10-16T22:02:00.000-07:00

I am 5'2" and weigh about 125 lbs (with a +/- 2 lbs fluctuation). According to the BMI, I am NORMAL. My clothing size ranges from 0 to 4, S or XS, depending on the make. I do not think that I am FAT in any way; I may not be thin - but I am by no way FAT. If I do think that I am FAT, then I would be suffering from body dysmorphic disorder.

That being said, I was judged as being curvaceous (i.e. FAT) by the male counterparts of my culture just because I don't quite fit in the 100 lbs, Size 00 mould. Bollocks! Unless you are sculpted like a Greek God (or better yet, Michelangelo's David), you have no right to call me FAT - got it?

p.s. It is laughable when I have arms that are more cut than yours...

Once bitten, twice shy; a couple times bitten, forever shy

2007-10-15T13:10:00.000-07:00

Once bitten, twice shy; a couple times bitten, forever shy - that, ladies and gentlemen is the reason that I am on a hiatus from dating.

Eeck!!!!

2007-10-11T20:56:00.001-07:00

Disclaimer: As a yogi, I really shouldn't be blogging about this incident but the human side of me can't help but wanting to share the following tale with you.

Just like any other typical weekday, I ended my work day with a visit to the yoga studio. As I was early to class this evening, I placed my mat towards the end of the room and proceeded to chill on my mat before class started. My attempt to find zen was momentarily disturbed (I mean seriously disturbed) when a middle-aged gentleman walked into the studio and placed his mat about a foot or so to the right of mine. I looked up and was almost blinded by what I saw - the gentleman seemed to have forgotten his shorts! He was merely attired in a tank top and his tightie-whitie - eeeck!!!! Horror thoughts started to run though my mind - what if we had to do a forward fold facing the right of the room? Channelling the Oscar-calibre actress within me, I pretended that nothing was out of ordinary and tried very very hard not to display disgust on my face.

Lucky for me, just before class was about to start, my yoga teacher requested that we all moved our mats towards the front of the room. I was quick (the quickest that I have ever been) to jump on the request and shifted my mat all the way to the front of the room instead. Phew! I was relieved to not have to face the possible unsightly vision in a forward fold. The first sun salutation into our practice, I noticed that the gentleman had left the room (I swear I wasn't checking him out - it was inevitable since I was facing the back of the room in downward dog position). The gentleman returned to the room shortly and this time in shorts - does this mean that he had forgotten to put on his shorts when he first walked in? or was that done was purpose?

Yogi took flight (AcroYoga)

2007-10-09T17:33:00.001-07:00

Over the Thanksgiving weekend (the Canadian Thanksgiving), I, not only over-indulged in turkey (a very delicious one cooked by my talented cousin but also had a new experience - AcroYoga. On a wimp and by pure chance, I signed up for a weekend acroyoga workshop and was definitely physically humbled. AcroYoga combines the practices of yoga, arobatics and thai massage and most importantly promotes the spirit of trust, connection and playfulness - http://www.acroyoga.org/.

Despite my recent struggle with my fundamental faith in good versus evil in humanity, I pleasantly surprised myself by placing trust in complete strangers to be my base as I fly in seemingly dangerous acrobatic moves. The sense of community was so full within the group of participants; the positive energy exuded by the group slowly restored my faith in the good of mankind.

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I am grateful for the strong support base from family/friends which allows for opportunities to explore new experiences.

Namaste

Project Runway Canada

2007-10-09T17:02:00.001-07:00

Love Love Love. I am usually not a fan of a Canadian version of a US reality show but this one I love. Project Runway Canada premiered last night at 7pm (PST) (same day rerun at 10pm) on Slice. Unlike the usual shoddy quality of the Canadian production (like the nightmare of Canada's Next Top Model - in my opinion), the production of Project Runway Canada was excellent - it rivals that of the US version and definitely was way better than Project Catwalk (the UK version). The casting was very well done - it showcased the diversity of our Canadian demography (which was my more PC way of saying my people were well-represented in the show). The only part of the show that was lacking was Tim Gunn. Brian Bailey, the mentor, tried to channel Tim Gunn by using Tim Gunn's favourite phrase of "make it work" but he was definitely no Tim Gunn. (Strangely, he reminded me of Jack Black playing the role of Tim Gunn - maybe it was the mustache). Cheesy as it may seem, I thought Iman's parting words to the eliminated designer of "you don't measure up" was more catchy than Heidi Klum's "auf wiedersen".

I am feeling much better about the new fall tv season now that Project Runway Canada is on. I will be feeling superb if CTV brings back Nip/Tuck - Season 5 - make it happen, TV God...

F-me pumps

2007-10-03T11:08:00.000-07:00

Shiny ruby patent-leather pumps - don't these pumps just scream S E X! Well, these are my latest favourite pair of shoes. Once I slipped these on, I instantly feel sizzling - yes watch out boys (haha).

Bright colored patent-leather shoes are a must to funk up this season's understated style (ala Marc Jacobs). Go get your own pair of F-me pumps while I sit here admiring mine.

Pleasant discovery in London

2007-09-26T11:29:00.000-07:00

Shopping in London gets expensive when one factors in the currency exchange difference between the Canadian dollars and Great Britain pounds. During my recent vacation in Europe, I was fortunate enough to spend a few days in London to check out the latest trends in UK. From past trips to London, I was resigned to window-shopping (over real shopping) until I stepped foot into Jocasi in the Carnaby Street area. Lo and behold I was in leather bags heaven. Not only were the bags fantastically hip, functional and well-made, they were very affordable (even after the foreign currency translation). The sales personnel were extremely helpful and generous with the discounts as well – which added to the pleasantries of shopping at the store. Jocasi – you have a brand new fan in me.

Lucky for non-UK residents like me, they do ship internationally :)
www.jocasi.com

A welcome back to Vancouver

2007-09-26T11:02:00.000-07:00

I am finally back after a few weeks in Europe. I'm happy to be greeted by the rain, familiar faces, high Canadian dollar (against the USD), a stranger on the street who told me he loves me, the signature Vancouver scent, and a store sign saying that Agent Provocateur is coming to town soon. I will blog about my trip later after I get over my excitement about Agent Provocateur - which of course is on my wish list (as you know lots of my wishes remain unfulfilled but a girl can dream and this one dreams big or perhaps in the case of lingerie, skimpy & lacy). This leads me to ponder: do women wear sexy lingerie for self or for an audience? Personally, I indulge for myself (given that there is never an audience unless you count unknowning neighbours who happened to peer into my windows while I am vacuuming).

Sartorialist

2007-09-05T00:12:00.000-07:00

Love love love this blog. It screams fashion and stylish hot men. Definitely a source of inspiration for being playful with fashion.

http://thesartorialist.blogspot.com/

p.s. After much browsing through this blog, I am starting to doubt the adequacy of the items that I have packed for my trip - hmm...back to square one on packing or suck it up for being less than stylish in Europe for the next few weeks?

Art

2007-08-29T23:23:00.000-07:00

In true procrastinator fashion, I finally made it to the Vancouver Art Gallery (VAG) last evening after work to catch the Monet to Dali exhibit before I leave for my vacation (yippee!) and before the exhibit wraps up on September 16. I waited in line for about half an hour before I feast my eyes with beautiful art. VAG was busy last evening because Tuesday evenings are by donations (which means that I make the suggested donation of $10 instead of paying the full admission fee of $20). As I was all by my independent self (yep...single people like me do things alone just so that we don't miss out on the fun), I was able to view the art at my own pace (which was fairly quick since I had to meet my dear cousin for yummy Jamaican dinner after my visit to VAG).

I am far (oh so very far) from being an art expert - although at times I wish that I had taken Art History so that I would be more knowledgeable about art. As I was looking at these masterpieces, I thought to myself "what is art?". Well, in my humble opinion, art is a piece of work that captivates, evokes emotions and tickles the curiousity of the audience. I am drawn to potraits/sculptures that shows emotion - (hmm...no wonder the Mona Lisa is so talked about - everyone is wondering who she is, what she is thinking about, etc.). I also like art that contains irony - i.e. things that don't seem to fit together in normality - the crazier the better (the likes of later works by Picasso and Van Gogh).

So....if you have yet to visit VAG, I do recommend this particular exhibit - it is always inspiring to be in the presence of beautiful things. Finally I get to see with my own eyes why a Renoir, Latour, etc. is worth millions of dollars. I felt privileged to receive such a fine visual treat (well for the price of $10 or 2 1/2 soy lattes).

Patience is not my virtue

2007-08-28T00:27:00.000-07:00

My grandfather coined my name which translates into "as you wish". Well, if that's the case, shouldn't I get whatever I wish for? Hmm.....still waiting for the fairy god-mother to grant my wishes....

Not so bad being a single girl when....

2007-08-25T17:59:00.000-07:00

A day like today makes it not so bad to be single. I had a totally carefree day today. It started off with a cup of invigorating black tea in the morning and mindless hour of tv viewing on the subject of fashion. Then got dressed and off to an hour of massage therapy. After a luxurious hour of a badly needed massage, I went to the cafe for a peppermint tea and a reverse almond chocolate cookie. A visit to the hair salon followed after my mini break. At the salon, I enjoyed a glass of mimosa while getting my scalp massaged and my hair cut and styled. After all the pampering, I should be of to meet my best lady friends for dinner and drinks later this evening. It would all be a perfect single girl's day if it's topped off with a kiss from a hot boy tonight (yes, I can still dream).

Pause & assess

2007-08-15T22:06:00.000-07:00

I went to the chiropractor yesterday for monthly maintenance cracking and while getting checked out, the chiropractor found a lump above my right collar bone. He was a little concern about finding a lump where there shouldn't be any lumps and instructed me to head to the doctor's office the same day. Since my appointment was in the late afternoon, I was not able to make it to the doctor's office the same day. I did not think much of it initially but my chiropractor's concern slowly crept into my mind which started me thinking what if - what if I am terminally ill. It sure caused me to pause and took a quick assessment of my life at the moment - how satisfy I am with the way I have been living my life? do I have any regrets? am I at peace with myself and my surrounding if I have to leave earth now? Surprisingly, I am at peace - of course, there are many more experiences that I wish to have had but I have done pretty well so far. I do what I love doing all the time - which is yoga. I have made choices that landed me on the high moral ground which seem to be a rather lonely place but it sure is peaceful - I have no guilty conscience and have done no harm (at least intentionally) to others. I am ok if I do have to breathe my last breath as a physical being and very thankful for all the experiences that I have had and the people that I have met along the way.

This morning I made it to the doctor's office - very calm (true to my personality). The doctor checked me out and assured me that the lump is in an area where he wouldn't be too concern with. So, for now - I am good (at least in terms of my health) and hopefully continue my journey in life - experiencing new things and loving myself more and more as each day goes by. [Damn - I look pretty hot in lingerie - haha]

Silly me

2007-08-13T16:58:00.000-07:00

My life is typically a comedy of errors and what happened last Friday evening was an example of such.

I had all week to pick up a gift for a friend’s yoga studio opening on the weekend but as a professional procrastinator, I left the gift-shopping duty until the day before the opening which meant that I was in a mad rush to shop for the gifts after yoga class on Friday evening. After picking up a bottle of champagne (as part of the gift) on my way home from yoga, I stopped by home to drop off my yoga mat and my other purchases of the day as well as to change out of my yoga outfit before heading out to shop for the second part of the gift, an orchid plant. Feeling quite warm from my brisk walk (i.e. mad rush), I changed into a casual summer sundress and put up my hair in a clip (since it was already frizzy and messy after a sweaty session of yoga). I decided to try my luck at the neighbourhood grocery store for the orchid plant. As I was lost in my own little world while perusing the aisles for the perfect studio opening plant, I was approached by a male shopper. To much of my surprise, the male shopper proceeded to shower me with compliments on how beautiful I looked in my dress. At this point, the thought of being punked started to cross my mind – this sort of thing do not happen to me, especially when I wasn’t looking my best that day. After checking around for possible Candid Camera crew, I graciously thanked my admirer. Some small talks and lunch invitation extended by my admirer led to exchange of number. Instead of accepting the admirer’s phone number, I gave him my phone number on a piece of paper (because I knew that if he gave me his number, the likelihood of me summoning enough courage to call was very slim due to a chronic condition of social shyness). After I turned down his invitation to hang out later that evening, we parted ways and I continued with my shopping.

As soon as I was back at home, I realized that unintentionally I had given my admirer an incorrect phone number – a moment of dyslexia had resulted in me incorrectly writing down the last digit of my phone number. (I had done this before to my capoeira instructor and I had given out an incorrect phone number by mistake on several occasions - I had a tendency to mix up part of my work phone number with part of my own phone number). Oh well - silly me.

A note to my grocery store admirer: I sincerely apologize for my mistake and thank you for the badly-needed ego boost that you have given me.

Dashed dreams?

2007-08-07T21:41:00.001-07:00

After years of reading and being drawn into the romantic world created by Jane Austen, I am slow and slightly melancholy to learn today that my beloved author, Miss Austen, died a spinster. Someone who penned such beautiful tales of romance with depictions of strong-minded heroines and equally impressive dashing heroes (with the likes of Mr. Darcy) actually never herself a wife to a handsome, intelligent, kind and loving husband? Does this mean that my hope and dream of perhaps someday meeting and spending forever after with my "Mr. Darcy" forever remain an illusion and never translate into reality? Darn, this is a revelation that I sought not of.

If only....

2007-08-04T22:59:00.000-07:00

If only guys are drawn to me like dogs and babies do, I probably won't be sitting at home on a Saturday evening blogging. Dogs of all kind, big and small, often run towards me, wanting to play. I, of course being a big sucker for dogs, often stoop down to their level to pet them and play with them. Babies often seem to be extremely curious and interested in me too - they can't take their eyes off me and they often wanted to interact with me. As much as I enjoy the attention from dogs and babies, I do sometimes wish that I could have the same captivation with men. (Ahh....I think it's about time the Universe start granting my wish...what do you think?)

Have you ever....

2007-07-21T23:11:00.000-07:00

I had a new experience today - I practiced yoga in the rain. It was most definitely a very Vancouver moment - with rain and yoga. Don't worry, crazy I was not - I was out in the rain participating in the annual Yogathon benefitting Camp Moomba - a charitable foundation raising money to send children with AIDS to camp. I was soaked from head to toe after 108 minutes of mix-styled yoga (including laughing, yin, asthanga & hatha styles). All of our sticky yoga mats became slippery once they were soaked in rain. We were all one with nature - rain, air, grass, and earth. Some of us were crazier than others for attempting arm-balancing postures on slippery mats - we could have broken our arms. Worry not - nobody got injured at the yogathon.

Rain or shine, the yogathon never disappoint - it was always a fun event to be a part of. Love for humanity was all around.....namaste.

Debut

2007-07-19T22:29:00.000-07:00

My national tv debut was a shot of my tush - fabulous isn't it? Of course, it was nothing perverted (I am still the prudish one) - it was a wholesome news reel introducing this year's Camp Moomba Yogathon event to be held on July 21, 2007. I was proudly wagging my yogi tush in downward doggy at the camera (of course I was not aware of the camera being there). The editor sure knew a good thing when he/she decided to keep the shot showcasing my tush on the news clip.

If you miss the news reel on the early morning news on Global tv, check out the clip on the Camp Moomba Yogathon website (www.campmoombayogathon.com). More importantly, if you are inspired by the news reel, feel free to make a generous donation or sign up for the event. The event is to raise money to send children with pediatric AIDS to camp where they can play freely without prejudice.

Namaste...

The high moral ground...

2007-07-18T22:03:00.000-07:00

The high moral ground is a very lonely place to be. My naive and out of date beliefs have led me to make choices that led me to the high moral ground which disappointingly turned out to be no fun and extremely lonely. Sigh....

Eating my own words

2007-07-12T20:56:00.000-07:00

I have never been shy about my opinion of yoga apparel being worn as street clothes outside the gym or the yoga studio. Now I have to eat my own words because today (the start of many more) I was wearing my yoga outfit walking through the busy shopping area of downtown to get home. For those who share my previous opinion, please spare me those dirty "fashion gone wrong" looks - please notice the yoga bag that I'm toting around too. Save those looks until the day I show up in yoga pants paired with a pair of high heels.

p.s. - My yoga studio has recently moved across town - which was why I had to walk around town now in my yoga apparel.

Unappreciated

2007-06-27T22:19:00.000-07:00

I have been quite vocal all week about being disgruntled - mostly due to something that I have to face with from 8:30 to 5 on days from Monday to Friday. The feeling of unappreciated for my integrity and expectation to deliver on my promises and to fulfil my responsibilities go unrewarded. I was starting to feel like a monkey punching away at the keyboard at times while alternating with the feeling of a robot with no creativity or feeling or sense of self. Well, that was not the issue that I was struggling with - it is the unfairness of the whole scene that got under my skin - as if I was clawed from inside out with deep scratches. I was getting that annoying feeling again - the one where the universe is turning against me once again - the one that I feel so confuse and lost without a fundamental belief to grasp on.

Then, I caught something on tv about child slavery which makes all that negative feelings go away. Of course I feel extremely sad for these children who were sold to slavery by their families for a mere few dollars. Children who barely understand how life is supposed to be were taken away from their families - young children who worked very hard just to be fed and sheltered (with no luxury at all) - I wonder how these children view the world and universe - survival. Watching the story about these children made me realize how lucky I am - how lucky to have freedom to see, to taste, to feel, to think, to listen, and to experience many things in the universe. For all that, I am thankful.

Tell me what you don't like about yourself...

2007-06-03T23:12:00.001-07:00

Tell me what you don't like about yourself?

Haha - where do I start. Honestly, I am quite happy with myself and I do like myself (surprise surprise). However, if I were to nit-pick, there is no doubt there's always room for improvement. Let's start with hair, I could use a deep-conditioning treatment to rejuvenate the moisture and bring back the shine to my dark curls. A chemical peel or laser treatment to resurface the skin on my face. A little brow-lift to open up my eyes and to balance out the symmetry of my left and right eye. A dose of botox to diminish the slight frown line on my forehead. A rhinoplasty to create more of a bridge to my nose and some liposuction to taper out my full cheeks to create more of a sulken model-chic look. A cup-size up for breast enhancement; a little liposuction on the tummy to suck out the remaining fat layer to give me that defined taut stomach (that I've always dream of); and finally more liposuction on my thighs just to trim them up so that I can wear short shorts (haha). Voila - that'll be the perfect me.

As alluring as a perfect me sounds, it is nevertheless a scary thought - if I were to do all the above to myself, I wouldn't be who I am, would I?

[Clearly, I am addicted to Nip/Tuck.]

It doesn't cost a thing to smile

2007-05-29T23:04:00.000-07:00

It sure doesn't cost a thing to smile - then why again am I so stingy with mine? This has gotta change...

Pushing the envelope

2007-05-28T10:51:00.000-07:00

Last Friday evening outside the Starbucks located at the corner of Thurlow & Robson sat a middle-aged gentleman of European descent reading alone. He was neatly dressed in a masculine grey suit with a white shirt. Nothing was out of the ordinary until I looked down and saw that he was wearing black patent ballerina flats with little bows on them. He did pushed the fashion envelope but still stayed within the rules of one funky item per outfit.

"Fashion is not a luxury, it is a right"

2007-05-20T17:54:00.000-07:00

"It is every woman's inalieanable right to have a pulled-together, stylish, confident wardrobe with money leftover to live" - Sarah Jessica Parker (SJP)

I caught a glimpse of SJP's new clothing line, Bitten, on last Friday's Oprah show. Stylish, funky, & cute as we can expect from the ultimate fashion icon of my days. The best part of the line is its affordability - every item is priced under $20. The line includes coats, suits, jeans, tops, bottoms, bags, and shoes (mmm....shoes). Bitten is available at Steve & Barry (in the United States only - unfortunately).

I think it is fantastic that SJP is making hip fashion affordable. Honestly, $300 jeans is just a tad outrageous. Women of all ages, sizes and income level should have the privilege to make themselves feel beautiful in cute, hip, & fashionable clothes without draining their bank accounts. Let's face it - not all of us girls are lucky enough to have rich husbands/partners to support our shopping habit - we want to have enough money left over from buying beautiful clothes to invest in our retirement fund or simply to put a roof over our heads and food on the table (rah rah to independent girls).

I love clothes and I love to shop but I refrain myself from plunking major bucks on outrageously expensive items. Ok - I do have my occasional splurges (but very very rarely and only on timeless pieces). I am not ashamed about finding cute & affordable items at places like Forever21 and Uniqlo. I am pleasantly surprised by the Joe line at Superstore and of course the designer lines at Target rarely disappoint.

Dressing up doesn't have to cost a lot - I have put together hip and funky new outfit (including shoes & accessories) for under $50. All it takes is an interest in fashion and the confidence to wear the clothes proudly. With the right attitude (which costs nothing), anyone can make heads turn with any outfits cheap or dear.

Mom

2007-05-13T23:51:00.000-07:00

When I grow up, I want to be the strong, independent, funny, confident, talented and endearing lady that my mom is. My mom always have the can do attitude - that's probably why she is always embraced by friends, family and even strangers. She can be so funny at times, especially with her creative usage of the English language - e.g. broken news (instead of breaking news). Her cooking rivals that of the top chef in town - which explains my Monday buddha belly. When my mom looks at me, I hope she doesn't wonder "whatever happen to my daughter - it must have been her dad's gene"....

Sexy librarian glasses

2007-05-09T23:04:00.000-07:00

I just picked up my pair of new sexy librarian glasses yesterday. These glasses make me want to put them on, toss them aside, shake my hair loose and ..... (purr?). Well, that will remain as a fantasy because in reality, I would be completely blind if I toss them aside, I will freak out if I break something that cost me more than $600, and let's not forget the part where I will purring to nobody.

"Sex in the City" - as in the show :P

2007-05-02T23:30:00.000-07:00

Sex in the City (as in the show) is one of my favourite shows - still is even after it's been over for a few years now. The appeal of the show lies majorly with the ease of identifying self with characteristics or quirks of the four main characters. Like Carrie, I am a curly-haired girl who also love fashion and shoes and have a weak spot for (very bad &) unattainable men like Big. I suffer from the social awkwardness of Miranda and of course, it doesn't help when I have the prudish moral beliefs of Charlotte - which naturally translates into Sexless in this City (haha). Funny thing is that friends somehow see the potential of a Samantha in me - where did that come from? ;p

"Hello My Name is ...."

2007-05-02T23:21:00.000-07:00

Where is the best spot to stick one of those "Hello My Name is ____" sticker if you are wearing a tube top? The options are quite limited: left boob, between the boobs, or the right boob. Note to self - avoid wearing tube top to event where name tags are required.

Warm fuzzy feeling doesn't just come from chocolate :P

2007-04-26T15:44:00.000-07:00

An e-mail from my grandaunt put a huge smile on my face this morning - a much welcomed change after a week of sulking and fake-smiling. She has informed me that I have successfully helped her reconnect with her long-lost friend. Actually, I did not do very much on my end except to search on the white pages online and crossing my fingers that the search result was actually the right person that I have hoped to be. I am, however, glad that I was able to do something nice for her (after all the Hermes scarves and sandals that she had handed down to me from my last visit to her home - inconveniently 18-hour flight away).

As minor as my deed was - I plan to enjoy every last bit of this warm fuzzy feeling I get from doing something nice for somebody.

Batatinha

2007-04-25T10:37:00.000-07:00

Batatinha - that's my capoeira nickname. It is common for capoeiristas to have nicknames to disguise their real identities (just like superheroes - haha). The actual history behind the nicknames came about during the prohibition of capoeira during the times of slavery until 1930s - capoeiristas went by their nicknames rather than their real names to escape prosecution from playing capoeira (if caught).

The literal translation of Batatinha is "little potato" (funny). However, in my case (well, at least according to my instructor who gave me the nickname), it's supposed to be a reference to Pebbles (from the Flinstones) - who is called Batatinha in Brazil. Apparently, I look like Pebbles - that's how I earned the nickname.

Next time we meet at a roda, I am Batatinha to you.

"He couldn't take my boop-oop-a-doop away!" - Betty Boop

2007-04-23T23:34:00.000-07:00